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Saying Goodbye For The Last Time

I once read a quote on the internet that has stuck with me ever since. I will be the first to admit that I am really sentimental, but there was something so profound about this quote that it resonated with me on such a deep level.

It read something like:

"At some point, your parents picked you up, put you back down and never picked you up again".

Every now and then this idea of things happening for the last time (without you knowing it's the last time) gets stuck in my head, and I get lost in a long train of thought about 'last times'.

Just a few weeks ago I was thinking about the last time I saw my Grandma (Grandmama, as we affectionately called her), and I was struck with a horrible realisation that it had been far too long. I made plans to see her immediately, and was looking forward to catching up with her but just a few days later, I got a call to tell me that she had passed away.

My Grandmama was about to turn 94, but that doesn't make her death any easier. She was independent and healthier than any other person I'd known over the age of 90; her death was unexpected and sudden despite her age. I also think that because she kept getting older without issue, I naively believed she would always be there. I almost convinced myself that there would always be another time to see her, but of course nothing lasts forever.

I keep thinking "if only I'd got my act together sooner and arranged to meet her, perhaps everything would be different", and everyone keeps saying I shouldn't think that way, but I can't help it. I know in my heart I should have seen her more in 2016, and now I am full of regret, sadness and pain. Life will not be the same without her.

Since her death I have learnt so much about her. She lived such an incredible life, and although I'll never be able to ask her about it directly, I have photographs and documents to look back on and live through those instead.

In 2017, I am going to make more time for the people I love, because you never know what the future holds or when anything will be the 'for the last time', and I urge whoever reads this to do so too.

I love you Grandmama.

The Beauty Magpie x

Where Have I Been?

I set up The Beauty Magpie in January 2013, so it's almost been 4 years since I penned my first post. Although the majority of my previous blog posts are now safely hidden in the draft section, this blog was once a regularly updated space on the web that generated quite a few views, comments and fans.

Of course at the time I thought my blog was failing, however looking back now I can see that it was flourishing. I wish I could have seen it for what is was at the time, because I'm sure if I believed it was a success I wouldn't have given up on it so easily.

I look at other bloggers who started around the same time as me and I can see the incredible work they're doing and how established they are now, and I can't help but think that could have been me...

My Unhealthy Relationship With Makeup

For as long as I can remember, I've always loved makeup. When I was little I used to riffle through my mum's lipstick collection and be amazed by the bright colours, waxy smell and creamy texture of the numerous shades she had collected over the years.

I don't remember my mum ever telling me I couldn't wear makeup, although I'm sure she did when I was very little, but since I was about 12, I've worn a flick of black liquid eyeliner across my eyelids. It's my signature look, and without it I look like a different person. No, scrap that...I feel like a different person.

As I've got older my makeup skills have developed and I can now (kind of) contour, blend eyeshadow properly and line my lips to make them look fuller (thanks YouTube!) But there's something I've realised about myself and my relationship with makeup - I don't really wear it for myself, I wear it because I feel it makes me seem more professional.

Walking in a Winter Wonderland

Once 1st November hits, I move straight on from Halloween, almost like it never happened, and start getting excited about Christmas! In fact, I'm usually the first one humming Christmas tunes everywhere I go, annoying other people greatly when they find themselves singing along voluntarily too...#SorryNotSorry!

I love every season in equal measure but there is no denying the warm fuzzy feeling I get when winter kicks in and I begin obsessing over mince pies, mulled wine and festive cheer. From watching the True Christmas movie channel every day, to drinking copious amounts of hot chocolate, I have many little Christmas traditions I play out during the festive season, including a routine visit to Winter Wonderland.

I am The Beauty Magpie

Well, well, well...look who's back! As I write this I am in total disbelief that it's happening, as I truly thought I had hung up my blogging hat over a year ago and traded it in for a new season style, never to be worn again. 

I never planned to stop writing on The Beauty Magpie, not really, but it happened for various reasons. 

I guess it's best to start at the beginning, and the truth is...I totally fell out of love with blogging. I didn't like my blog, I grew apart from the blogging community and I was so insecure about my blog in comparison to others. The content I was writing wasn't anything special, I was struggling to thrive in the blogosphere and I simply wasn't up for the challenge of making it work. It quickly became obvious that I was just posting for the sake of it, and trying really hard to be like everyone else...